“I’m Free” - Why We Don’t Stay in the Pain

By Alan Lowis

I'm Free - Song by Alan Lowis

In the previous piece — “Help Me- When It Feels Like You Almost Can’t Go On”— we talked about something important, something that often gets missed.

When people are hurting, it’s not helpful to deny their pain or tell them to “just be positive.” Pain is real. Fear is real. And sometimes we genuinely don’t know how we’re going to get through what we’re facing.

In those moments, the most honest and human thing we can do is acknowledge the truth of how we feel.

That’s what the song “Help Me” is about.

It gives voice to the moments when things feel overwhelming, when fear has a grip on us, and when something deep inside is asking for support.

That matters — because pain that isn’t acknowledged doesn’t disappear. It tightens.

But acknowledging pain is not the same thing as living there.

Pain has a purpose, but it is not meant to become our identity. 

When we’re suffering, something subtle but powerful happens in the mind. Fear and pain don’t just hurt — they begin to feel certain.

We become certain that things are bad.

Certain that they won’t change.

Certain that we may not be able to handle what’s coming next.

That certainty is what creates suffering.

The pain itself is hard — but the belief that it is permanent, personal, and pervasive is what drains our strength.

That’s why, in the first article, and in the first song “Help Me,” the focus wasn’t on forcing positivity. It was on breaking the stranglehold of that certainty — even slightly — by allowing a spark of hope back in.

Hope doesn’t fix everything.

But hope loosens fear’s grip.

The challenge is that hope, by itself, is still unstable.

Hope says maybe. Hope wavers.

Hope flickers under pressure.

And when we stay there too long, fear sometimes has a way of rushing back in and pulling us back into darkness or suffering.

That’s why the next step truly matters.

Strength doesn’t come from repeating the pain over and over.  Strength comes from building certainty in a different direction. 

This is where the song “I’m Free” comes in.

The song exists for a very specific reason — one grounded in how the mind and nervous system actually work.

Music is powerful. Words repeated with emotion don’t just express feelings — they condition them into our subconscious mind.

When we sing something again and again, we aren’t just describing an experience. We’re reinforcing a belief and building emotional muscles.

That’s why it’s important to be careful about what we repeat.

There is value in acknowledging pain. There is value in saying this hurts.

But we don’t want to wire our system to stay there. 

We want to recognize the pain. We want to get its message, which is usually that its time to change our focus, change a belief, or to change our circumstances or environment.

“I’m Free” takes the same emotional doorway — the same melody, the same cadence — and transforms what we’re reinforcing to something that serves you going forward.

Instead of repeating uncertainty and fear, it repeats something else:

I can face this.

I will make it.

I am strong enough.

That repetition matters.

Not because it magically removes problems, but because it builds certainty about what we say over and over — and certainty is what gives us our footing back.

People find that certainty in different ways.

Some draw strength from other people — friends, partners, family, or community.

Some find it through faith — God, prayer, nature, the universe, or a sense that something larger is holding them.

And some find it within themselves — a quiet knowing, often earned through hardship, that they are capable, resilient, and still standing.

What matters is not where that certainty comes from, but that we choose to reinforce it. 

Music, words, and thoughts repeated with emotion don’t just express how we feel — they condition what our mind and nervous system come to believe. 

That’s why it’s worth choosing what we repeat. When we intentionally condition words and thoughts that serve us and strengthen us, we give ourselves something stable to stand on.

And when certainty shifts, the body responds.

Breathing deepens.

The constant bracing eases.

The nervous system settles.

We’re no longer collapsing into fear.

We’re standing again, steadier and stronger.

That’s the difference between surviving and moving forward.

So this isn’t about denying pain.  It’s about not staying trapped in it.

Feel the sadness.

Acknowledge the fear and pain.

Let it be real.

And then — when it’s time — move your body and reclaim your power.

Choose not to reinforce pain, fear and sadness but rather choose to sing the song that builds you. Not the one that keeps you asking if you’ll make it, but the one that reminds you that you will.

“Help Me” opens the door.

“I’m Free” helps you walk through it, and keep walking taller.

They are meant to exist together — not to keep us in suffering, but to help us transform it.

Pain tells us that we need to change something.  Maybe something inside like our focus, a belief, a habit.  And sometimes it tells us we need to take action to change something outside of us.  Get out of the situation or the environment or stop the behaviors or actions that are causing the pain.

Pain is information, not an identity.

If you’re still in the middle of things, there’s no rush.

Certainty doesn’t always arrive all at once. It often returns gradually — through repetition, through practice, through choosing what you feed your mind and nervous system.

Pain shows us that something needs to change.

Sometimes that change is internal — a shift in focus, a belief, a habit, or the story we keep telling ourselves. Sometimes it’s external — a situation, an environment, or a set of behaviors that no longer serve us.

But once the message is received, we are not meant to stay in the pain.

We are meant to transform it.

When you stop reinforcing fear and start reinforcing strength, something changes.You stop collapsing inward.You begin to stand.

And from that place — grounded, present, and certain — you don’t just survive.You move forward.You live. You thrive.

"I'm Free" - Song Lyrics

By Alan Lowis

[Verse 1]

Not doing this on my own

I know that I’m never alone

I have guidance

Find peace in the silence

I have direction

I walk in protection

Unending connection

See light in my own reflection

[Chorus]

I’m free

I know that I can make it

I feel like I can face it

I know that I will make it

[Verse 2]

See me

Hear me

Watch me

I’m free

I’m rising

I’m breathing

I’m believing

[Chorus]

I’m free

I know that I can make it

I feel like I can face it

I know that I will make it

[Verse 3]

Love in my heart, I’m ready to start

I have no limit, feel like I’m winning

Inside I’m burning, my fire is returning

I feel so loved inside, my heart is open wide

I feel so strong where I stand

[Chorus]

I’m free

I know that I can make it

I feel like I can face it

I know that I will make it

[Bridge]

You’re not alone

I’m always here You’re always loved

Let go the fear

It’s not the end

You’re not alone

You’re on your way

You’re coming home

Breath by breath

Step by step

You’re on your way

A brand new day

[Final Chorus]

I’m free

I know that I can make it

I feel like I can face it

I know that I will make it

I’m free

I know that I can make it

I feel like I can face it

I know that I will make it

I’m free

I know that I can make it

I feel like I can face it

I know that I will make it

I’m me.

If This Song Resonated with You - Share It

If you’ve already come through something difficult, we hope this song reminds you of your strength — and of the moment you realized you were going to make it.

If you’re still finding your footing, we hope it helps you feel steadier, more grounded, and more certain of what’s possible.

And if someone came to mind as you listened — someone who’s been through a lot, or who’s ready to move forward — consider sharing it with them. Let it serve as a reminder that strength returns, that there is a way forward, and that they are not alone in taking the next step. And that someone wants very much to see them thrive again.